Archive for December, 2006

A walk down memory lane for 2006.

Saturday, December 30th, 2006

Another
year has come and gone. Celebrated my new year’s eve in US.
Befitting… Since I learned salsa for most of 2006, might as well
ended it with Salsa.

My brain is in a semi-comatose state now
due to lack of sleep. However, this is the time when the brain enters a
semi-hypnotical state (which some ppl termed stoned) whereby i can tap
into the deep recess of my subconscious mind for events that has
happened during the past year. . ok here goes, *plug in receptors to
brain*

As
in synonymous with every year, I will attempt to try to master a few
skills in an attempt to prevent my brain from degenerating into
nothingness and bones from disintegrating into powder. Last year,
2005, I managed to pick up scuba diving which resultingly burned a hole
in my pockets. 1 diving trip 300 bucks, I went for 4 trips, can eat
grass for whole month liao.

Anyway,
in 2006, I picked up Salsa, (for those still living in the hills, Salsa
is a latin dance, not some spicy sauce of chopped, uncooked vegetables
or tomatoes, onions, and chili peppers.) My long-time friend, Wendy has been pestering me to
join since 2005 but I keep on procrastinating as I was like SALSA? *image
of guys in leotard gyrating to some gila music flashed by* :P  So, I tried
to "tai chi" it away by claiming I am busy.. until one fateful day when
Steven said he is interested to join and for some goddamn reason, I
decided to tag along with him. And that started my salsa escapade. And
what a ride it was. It got me hooked. Soon, I was practising my
turnings in my room, in da bathroom (which I slipped and hantum my butt
a few times), any place that has a 4×4 area. It practically took up the
bulk of the year. And, interestingly enough, I discovered I have shed some dino fats down after dancing. I tried out my jeans 7 years ago and
whoopie! I could wear them.

Also, with salsa, a new bunch of friends emerged and my social
circle suddenly imploded. Hope its as good as it last. You know me.. I
am that kind of person who will fade out within time when my interest
dies out. As with IRC and partying… which used to rule my life before 2001. But that ended with wisps of smoke. (烟消云散) Hopefully, this interest will last longer. haha. And within
the group, a few couples are formed.

Dano:
hmm, how come u not in one of the couples? What have u been doing? Very
the 失败 leh… salsa for so long, still cannot get hitched. 下suay siah,
be your double.

Dino: 哪背, I shy lah.

Dano: Yah right, if you are shy, i am gay.

Dino:
@@ … if you are gay, then doesn’t that makes me… *kokz
Dano*.

Anyway, I am too busy memorising the salsa sequences, rueda
commands and steps…

Dano: see??? EXCUSES!
Dino : *takes duct tape and tapes Dano’s mouth.*

that I have no time to find a gf.  Somemore, I have
seen couples disappearing from union square after they got hitched. Ok, Terence, dun protest, i heard u. :P I know you are different. Cos you can only come out during the 阳历七月. But didn’t
blame them for that lah. For me, that’s not my top priority for now lah. Hell manz, I can’t imagine me getting married with KIDS terrorizing me. Hehe, I leave it to Clotho to spin my threads bah. If have, have loh, if dun
have, doesn’t matter lah. Used to being single anyway.
And I am still waiting for the 10 years to be up, BB. :P. Also, Salsa
still interests and invigorates me. So far, it is a good way to release stress. Guess I will still continue with it if work permits.

Work-wise in 2006 is a another learning experience. After extracting myself out from the confinements of the armed forces in 2004, life has been a revelation. Initially, I was not used to the fast-paced work life environment and there is a huge learning curve. But after the getting the hang of it, hey! I do enjoy it. At least for now, I get paid for my effort@ work. The most ironic thing is that I am back to studying. Haha, doing the thing which I hate most during my poly years. 

For 2007, in
an odd way, I’m looking forward to more salsa and rueda. If nothing
else, all the dancing and ona bulla will help me forget the fact that
(a) I’m still single and (b) Chinese New Year is just around the
corner, another occasion to be dreaded. As we speak, I’m psyching
myself up for the inevitable "This had better be the last ang-pow I
give you, ok? When are you getting married?" *yawnz* *surfs tiger airways for a quick getaway during CNY*

Oh, before I end, have to set some resolutions for 2007(not in order of merit):

1) Get those damn certifications and ask Boss to increase pay.
2) Move out of Response center and into Service center.

3) Be on beat in dancing Salsa so Wendy won’t give me the scrunched up *off beat liao* face.
4) Read more. Learn more. Too much salsa has made me lost touch with my reading habits. Must pick it up again.

5) Buy a DSLR camera and learn photography skills. (this one expensive, sure burn pocket, burn POSB book)
6) Go gym. (this one say for shiok one, say for 5 years liao still haben manage to do it) (Eh, Brutus, I know u will offer to help me on this, but I dun wan to train up my chest till I am like u leh, need to wear bra siah) :P
7) Learn different forms of dance.. (hopefully I have time for this)
8) Visit Egypt. ( this one also lagi expensive and dangerous but I want to visit the pyramids!)

Ok dokie, will be back next year and see if any of the above are accomplished.
Meanwhile, Adios Con la Hermana.

The day when the parparazzi got saborazzied.

Saturday, December 2nd, 2006

Being a paparazzi, I always write gossipy finger licking stories about others. Haiz, to think I have to write a blog about myself in the end and it happens on my red-letter somemore..

I remembered as the red-letter day looms deviously near, I hiao hiao calculated the odds and probability of having to celebrate my bday and of cos, kena sabo in union.. after an exhaustive, mentally draining calculation of using the formula 1+1 = 2, the odds came out… DAMN, the chances of kena sabo is like stepping on an ant on the ground. Si Sua step also will kena one that kind.. *raises my head up to the sky and sighs* Guess this is the karma of being a paparazzi, but being emblazoned with the never-say-die paparazzi spirit, I began to formulate contingency plan to avert the disaster.. and thus plan E.F.U.S (Escape From Union Square) was born..

PLAN E.F.U.S  : To ask my boss for a job on Saturday.. must be those long hours, zho bo job that can last till midnight… then steady, no need to go Union liao.. no need to tio sabo liao.. Smart right? And, as chances would have it, lady’s luck is smiling on me and my colleague asked me on Monday if I wanted to work on a relocation job on Saturday.. Immediately, without thinking, I onz him. Let’s see, a relocation job, will take around 10 hours to complete, just nice for my plan manz.. So I informed my  dear friends that I will be working on Saturday, thus foiling any bday celebration planned for me .. At this point of time, you may ask, why am I so reluctant to celebrate my birthday? Well, it’s becos I don’t have the habit of celebrating one.. Let me see, my last bday celebration is donkey years ago. Think I stopped celebrating after 21..  and thus, i have forgotten on how to celebrate a bday liao. It will be like… asking a chicken to dance… anyway, its kinda awkward for me plus the fact that I am shy somemore.. *blushes*

Dano : *pukes*

Dino : *kicks Dano to holland*

But alas, Fate did have other plans for me.. the relocation job is one hell of a job, si beh shaq… and its like a freezer there… Drained my brain juice and sapped my "Yang" energy.. finally, the agony stopped at 6pm and boy, was I tired… and at that damming moment, I received a sms from Brutus… asking me if it is true i am not going to union… at that point in time, mabbe I was tired, I forgot about the master plan … I was wondering, now why would he say that? I will go union on Sats one mah, automatic one.. weird guy, never call to jio me to union before, and now bo dai bo ji send a sms asking me whether I will go. So I called him (cursing myself for it) … and told him I just got off work… and mabbe I will be going to union after all (Note: I forgot it’s 2nd of December at that moment..mabbe the freezing aircon (16 degrees) has gotten into my brain, freezing any neurons signals transmissions). The moment the words left my mouth, Brutus sort of announced that I am off work and is going to union after all… *5 seconds pause* OH SHIT! what have I said??? Immediately, I tried to tell Brutus that I am tired, and sick (nursing a cough) and won’t be going after all… He then passed the phone to the leader of the subclub 58.. who issued a 通殺令that I must be at union at all costs, else she will come to my house to drag me there.. now.. when the leader of the subclub 58 makes such a statement, she means what she said… so LL, have to make cameo appearance liao… there goes PLAN E.F.U.S down the long kang…

At this moment, Dano tells me this…

Dano : See lah, hiao lah, chut simi PLAN E.F.U.S, now u kena Plan S.T.D.P liao..

Dino: Plan S.T.D.P? simi pattern?

Dano: Plan S = Plan Sabo.The.Damn.Parparazzi

Dino : *looks at Dano with narrow, evil eyes*

Dano: Whack lah, Bro, just go along for the ride…once in a year only.. "suffer" for once only..who ask you to bo dai bo ji be parparazzi lah..  see? all paparazzis no good ending one..

Dino: _|_  shuddup….. *sweat*

With a sense of fear, I headed for union… when I reached, I saw salsa-in-the-toilet dude .. He is the first to gratz me on my bday.. I smile (but inside i was thinking, "siao liao.. even the 1.5 class group is there, means they know"..Nevertheless, i tried to appear non-nonchalant (la la la) and act its like no big deal, but fact is.. i am having this dreaded topsy-turvy somersault feeling in moi stomach.. but bo bian, since there liao, got to be sporting.. next, I saw Miss Blur Queen who also teased me about my bday.. Shit.. even trumpet knows.. cham liao.. bo beh zhao liao.. Then I saw Mr Smooth aka Virgin who wishes me too..  I was like.. what..even he knows? so much for low profile.. anyway, as the night drags on, the more awkward and uneasy I feel.. then i decided to head outside for a breather.. and thinking, ok mabbe I will go in back at 11pm.. then they wont celebrate liao loh.. but suay suay.. si lang Fate machiam is like James Bond, covered all tracks.. I headed to the back entrance and saw Brutus there.. wana do a Naruto but too late, he saw me trying to pull a fast one on him…LL..kena hauled back to Union.. and I was under Union House Arrest after that… Brutus and Mr J kept a close watch over me to ensure I won’t give them the slip..

Then the moment came, the bday cake was finally bestowed on me…

Img_1474

It’s so awkward to celebrate one’s bday at my age.. but nevertheless, have to be sporting and celebrate..after all, my dear friends took the effort to celebrate for me, so the bday song was sang and the cake cutting ceremony was performed and.. suddenly, out of nowhere, i heard the band singing out my name… *mind blank for a while* was thinking," oh no, they didn’t, they promised they won’t sabo…" I panicked and tried to make the great david copperfield escape from Union Square, but I was pulled to the dance floor by the bachata queen herself.. what to do? dance loh.. heng…. there are already a few couples dancing on the dance floor, so not so malu, just imagine me dancing on the dance floor alone, wah lao, i am only just a beginner dancer leh, where got qualified?? But there is also another problem, as Mr Virgin has said before (who happens to be a better dancer than me), it’s not about whether the dance floor is yours, its about whether there are gals who wanan dance with u.. heng.. I got a group of beautiful ladies friends who are willing to dance with a beginner like me. Thanks for that, ladies.. *uses hanky to wipe away tears welling up in eyes* appreciate it even though I dono what the hell i am doing out there.. :) I am never more relieved to hear the end of the song, cos I am covered in cold sweat and with rubbery legs… It’s one hell of an experience and I won’t want to experience that
ever again…  I am not that of a showstopper.. I am a showfreezer..
meaning I will freeze in front of a crowd..  :P Nano, I can imagine how u
feel, when you are alone on the dance floor.  It was *mind blank*. Period. 

But I would like to convey my utmost thanks and gratitude and love to the following people specially,

1) Mr J. for buying the cake and taking the over-exposed photos…

2) Bachata Queen and Head of Sub-club 58 for leading me to the dance floor and planning Plan S.T.D.P.

3) Brutus for sms-ing me and made me forgot my plan E.FU.S as a result.

4) Mr Virgin aka Mr Smooth for planting a KISS on the cheek.. And thanks for letting me have your first male virgin kiss..

5) Mr B for keep on shouting out my name out like some bloody bullhorn…

5) all the beautiful ladies, Karen, Serene, Christine, Evelyn, Serene Hoi, Elyn, Wenling, Germaine, Tarcie, Karen, Lorraine, Audrey who danced with me… without u all, I will be like a Cha Tao on the dance floor.

6) And not forgetting Brutus aka Prissy and Mr La Una for dancing with me too..

7) Lastly, to those friends who were there to celebrate and witness moi awkwardness.. Thank you, ppl… I luv you all.

-Dinorazzi